When someone insists that you expose in public, and refuses to engage in any other manner, then that’s an issue. I see a fair amount of pretty classic “schoolyard bully” behavior on HN, which is interesting, as this is a professional forum, frequented by some of the most influential people in the industry.
Bullies like an audience. They want people to see their behavior.
I know of a number of folks on HN, that are convicted felons, often running companies that help other convicted felons, interested in going legit (This does not include the much greater number of “uncaught” felons. I bet that every blackhat has an HN handle, and I'll also bet that they are some of the best-behaved HN members).
Occasionally, one of these folks may choose to post some portion of their personal journey. I am grateful to read what they post, and would never dream of demanding that they post more. If I find what they post compelling, I might contact them directly.
HN is a public forum where anyone from around the world can sign up from young aspiring programmers to retired folk. I haven't seen bullying on HN but it's worth noting that I don't consider disagreement to be bullying. Words have meanings.
One cool thing about HN is that the community largely leans towards precision and clarity with less tolerance for hype and fluff.
There is no DM functionality built into HN - as it's a public forum not a private messaging app. Some people may put contact details into their profile but they shouldn't have an expectation that that communication channel is used.
One of my personal philosophies, is that I stand behind my words. I don’t hide behind anonymity (I’m a reformed troll -this was not always my personal credo). I make it easy to verify (or refute), anything I say, and do my best to treat community venues with respect.
I do know that there are some folks here that seem to be obsessively in hate with me. I’m not exactly sure what I’ve done, to earn their regard, but at least one of them, has tried taking their rancor “offline.” Didn’t really do much damage, and hasn’t caused me to change my approach. I've had literal axe murderers angry with me, IRL, so some Internet Tough Guy Magazine cover model isn't going to rattle me much.
It has, however, confirmed to me, that this place is not above some fairly childish behavior.
HNers are normally open to discussing what they themselves post about. I think we can agree to leave the vaguebooking to the sulky teens on FB.