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This is the most useful advice: call the police non-emergency number, explain concisely, and ask them what to do.

A bunch of the other suggestions, here on HN Streetwise ProTips, can get self and/or friends beaten, stabbed, and/or arrested.



IDK where you live but where I am, unless it's an actively life threatening emergency, the Police will say they're busy. I watched a drunk driver try to drive away after smashing into a parked car, ripping a wheel off the parked car. The drunk driver kept trying to start his car to get away. People called the police but they said they're busy. Fortunately his car was totaled and wouldn't start either. Over an hour later someone picked him up. If they can't even bother to deal with an active drunk driver, they aren't gonna help retrieve a bike.

Not saying confronting thieves is for everyone. But it's not necessarily as physical as you think.


> IDK where you live but where I am, unless it's an actively life threatening emergency, the Police will say they're busy.

Where I live the basic law/constitution establishes a protection duty of its citizens by the state (this includes their property). The police is one of the ways the state takes care of this duty. If the state is grossly negligent in this or even does nothing at all, the state may very well be on the hook to make the injured party whole. This responsibility is passed down and carried by individual police officers, and there have been cases of police officers being personally convicted of causing bodily harm for not dispatching a unit after a request for aid (despite them not personally swinging any punches)[1].

Generally you'll have police show up for near anything if they can.

[1] https://www.wz.de/panorama/nach-notruf-keine-streife-geschic...


In the US, it’s been established by the Supreme Court that the police have no duty to protect anyone. They can it they want to, and individual departments can make it a policy and fire officers who fail at it, but it’s not a fundamental requirement.


I live in Arlington, VA where I once saw a purse snatcher being chased by 5 cops. Only to have 3 more show up after the guy was on the ground. They all had their own cars too.

During COVID, I called the non emergency line police for a break in on my car parked on the street and the police showed up in minutes then searched the area frantically to see if the guy was still around.

I don’t know if they are over funded or just bored.


Sounds like you live in a crappy big city like SF, Oakland, Santa Clara, etc.

For the vast majority of people who live in reasonable cities, calling the police for something like that will get a timely response.


Please tell us the magical place you live in that has friendly, helpful police with time to investigate every crime.


Suburbs. We get 84 squad cars showing up for noise complaints...

Many larger cities don't have the budget to provide adequate police coverage. So you get this sort of "best effort" response.

This is made worse with recent years of "defund the police" policies creeping into some of our larger cities.

It just reinforces the Pro 2A community's saying - when seconds matter, help is just minutes away.


I live in "Suburbs" I have never seen 84 police cars respond to anything, even school shootings.


Maybe try living in actual suburbs, not "Suburbs"?


Didn’t happen in the small North Carolina town that my parents live in, with a very similar situation as the parent. So truly, YMMV. Not all places can be generalized.


Santa Clara, population 110,000, is a big city to you?


Someone I know's phone was stolen. He tracked it using the track my phone feature to a house, and contacted the police asking the police to help get it back. The police said no, it's too dangerous, not worth it.


No, THE most useful advice is not to take legal advice from cops.


How do you think the police will give bad advice, if you call them up and ask what to do?


There are countless examples of police not knowing the law.

If you talk to them in person, it should be to get an idea of what they'll do, which may or may not have something to do with what's legal.

If you want legal advice, ask a lawyer with experience in the relevant area.


You don't want legal advice. You know where your stolen bike is, so you call the police. I think that's the usual process.

Probably they will verify that the bike is yours, and retrieve it, or they will say that they don't have the resources.

Are people imagining that the police will say that you can go take the bike, but then turn around and arrest you for theft?

Of course, if the police tell you "finders keepers; it's in the Constitution", then you can seek legal advice.


No. The police will offer you the option to come to the police station and fill out a report so you can get a police report number for your insurance claim. Nothing else will happen.

Police don’t usually investigate petty crimes.


> Are people imagining that the police will say that you can go take the bike, but then turn around and arrest you for theft?

People are imagining the police will tell you that you can't steal it back, when legally you can.

After all, it's the police's job to keep the peace. And things are more peaceful if I'm not busting up thieves' hideouts all guns blazing like Rambo.


I’m also imagining the police telling you that you can do something that is actually illegal, and then you get prosecuted for it. “The cops said it was ok” may not be an adequate defense.


A cop telling you it's okay to do something, and then getting arrested for it, might be one of the only times you can correctly claim entrapment.


So all Jessie Pinkman's got to do is ask the under cover police if it's okay to sell them meth and then they can't be arrested for it?

Entrapment is reserved for the police going above and beyond, eg "sell me meth or I'll kill your dog" where it can be argued that the entrapped normally would not do the crime.


Apparently there is “entrapment by estoppel” in which a government official tells you an act is legal when it isn’t. They have to be acting as a representative of the government, though; undercover cops wouldn’t count.

I still wouldn’t be very excited to try this defense in court.


> So all Jessie Pinkman's got to do is ask the under cover police if it's okay to sell them meth and then they can't be arrested for it?

No, this is about on duty police in uniform saying it's okay.


Don't you know the other rule of drug dealing? If you ask an undercover cop if they're an undercover cop, they have to tell you the truth? it's against the rules for them to lie about it.


That's a reasonable suspicion (though I think a lot of the contrarian comments are just people who want to complain about the police).

Working with that suspicion, especially given that this is HN, police saying "don't go steal it back" might still be very good advice, regardless of legal right.

For example (referring back to a scenario earlier in thread), I'm imagining a techbro crew, all jumping into one of their Teslas, and rolling up on misguided urban youth turf.

There's already a lot of misunderstanding and animosity, both ways, between stereotypes. And someone's attempt at "show of force" just escalated it. So, who will escalate the stupid further, and stab or draw a gun first.


They aren't even required to know the law.


> How do you think the police will give bad advice

the police will give you any advice, good or bad. They're not legally responsible for anything they said to you, as long as they're not telling you to commit a crime (in which case, if they did they will deny it).

You can still call 'em up of course - but don't 100% just trust their words blindly.


At this point in the US, it seems we are far better off asking ChatGPT or Claude than the average police station.


Ages ago when I tried calling the police...

"We cannot answer legal questions, please seek a lawyer for advise."

I don't do anything terribly interesting, so this was almost certainly not an issue actually worth paying $200 for a lawyer to answer.


Depends on how well they do their job, it's not hard to imagine them saying "file a report" and then ignoring it.


It's probably a bad sign if you need permission from a desk clerk to get your property back.

It's great that you think _someone will handle that for you_ but it is probably a fantasy. Unfortunately you will probably need to self resolve. If you think it is going to escalate to violence, bring overwhelming force.




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